Recently, a colleague and I were speaking together about the experience of our work as therapists. Together we were reflecting on the honor and privilege of being in relationship with those we work with. As a therapist, there is a deep and profound reverence for the conversations we know. There is an immense honor felt as we are invited into others’ lives and the places most meaningful, tender and sacred.

When someone chooses to begin therapy, the timing of such a choice is significant. Most often, it comes after much contemplation and many attempts to create change in isolation or with resources no longer sufficient. Initiating therapy is an act of courage and strength. It is one of hope for difference and determination of the preferred.

Each year, millions of people begin therapy in search for preferred ways of living and being in relationship with loved ones. For most of us, a time will arise when the visions we hold about ourselves and our lives simply do not match our present experiences. As the space grows wider between our desires and our circumstances, myriad ways arise to assist us in coping and to speak out boldly about the change we long to experience. In body and spirit, a rising up calls us into action toward the change we need.

Often, such change cannot unfold alone. Furthermore, it shouldn’t need to. We are not creatures of isolation. We need one another. There is immense value in watching change unfold and newness begin within the context of relationship. Within a therapeutic relationship, there is a commitment to confidentiality and a sense of safe and sacred space. It is in this space, where questions become a catalyst for difference and conversations are powerful and life-giving.

When should I seek therapy? If this is a question you find yourself asking, most likely therapy is of value in the present. There is an internal prompting that is stirring; perhaps it has been for quite some time. There is curiosity for what is possible. There is desire for change. If you find yourself desiring difference in your life between what is and what could be, there is no better time to seek it. This is the only life we get. Create the one you desire.

As a note to parents, it can be challenging to discern when therapy is in the best interest of your child. Often, children and teens are not excited about the idea of beginning therapy. Although such resistance seems to be changing for this impressive generation, hesitation is to be expected to a large degree. Therapy is a new and often unfamiliar arena. It is seldom comfortable to venture toward the unknown.

It is my encouragement to parents that this space of discomfort must not hold power to prevent seeking help. We tend to exist in an unprecedented era of parenting where children are profoundly indulged and where parents are often fearful to risk offending their child or creating dislike or tension. This element of power has tremendous effects and destruction when allowed to control parental decisions.

My belief as a therapist is that too often we fail to recognize emotional or psychological challenges with the same measure as physical conditions, yet they are equally powerful in the effects they bring to our lives — often leaving a legacy for years to come and for future generations.

It would seem reckless and irresponsible to decline or defer treatment for cancer or diabetes. There should be no difference in seeking to intervene where depression or anxiety or a struggling family relationship bring their painful influence. If your child or adolescent is experiencing a difficult season in his/her life, I urge you to act on their behalf and give them the gift of seeking help. Do not allow this struggle to grow unnecessarily.

I wish you well in your journey as you take action toward the life you seek.

Shannon Renae West is a licensed family therapist serving families on the Eastside. She can be reached at (425) 415-6556 or via e-mail at ShanWest@msn.com.